I will begin with a confession. This blog post is a long time coming. Back in November 2015, after a session with my coach, I wanted to write a blog per week for a couple of reasons. First, because I can write on topics that are relevant to my coaching practice (individual identity, relationships, career change, leadership, managing overwhelm, starting a business, courage and parenting) which all support the programs I offer my clients. Second, because I love the creative element of writing. All good intentions and very well meaning, however, not executed on ‘paper’ at all.

Sure, I’ve prepared and written many in my mind while I’m out for a run or in the shower or driving in my car. But sit at the computer and punch out keystrokes, uh-uh, nope. Somehow I find sitting on the step of my staircase with my iPhone in hand using only my right thumb to quickly jot down an idea, inspiration or something I do in my daily life and post it to social media. I’m very consistent, even prolific, at this. Perhaps it doesn’t seem as ‘real’ or perhaps I allow my fear and freakin’ inner critic to sabotage real writing. Why should I think that only author’s or published writers are legitimate?! It’s ridiculous really.
I have things to say, so, starting now, I’m going to say them. Hopefully someone will resonate with some of my stuff and that it is helpful (if it does, please send me a note; words of affirmation are my Love Language)!!

Kary Oberunner, coach/author/podcastor spoke on moving from ‘loser’ mentality to ‘winner’ mentality and the blind spots between what we know and what we do http://www.karyoberbrunner.com/coach . For instance, I have a folder that is bulging with information -data, thoughts, snippets, articles, inspirations, quotes, blog postings, notes from conferences/sermons/podcasts, and on and on to overflow capacity! This ‘folder’ is physical, electronic and captured in the filing system of my mind. What I know is a tremendous amount. What I do is lacking. There is a gap. This crevice can overwhelm me sometimes. It bumps up against one of my core values – integrity. It is one of my ‘high fives’ ( if you have worked with me you know that we focus a lot on values – which are the foundation of who we are- everything we do and say stems from this core). I expect integrity in others and I hold myself accountable to this level of honesty and strong moral principle too. So you can understand my discomfort when I say I’m going to do something and I don’t. It can wreck me or at the very least make me feel mildly miserable. I don’t even fall for my own lame excuses and unworthy justifications. I cringe.

I’ve noticed that we, as a culture, justify ourselves and others quite a bit. Why? Is it that we just can’t admit our shortcomings? What if we do? What if you allow yourself the freedom to say “I messed up, I wanted to do this but I didn’t”. What if we simply apologized, without excuse, for our poor choice, or lack, or missing the mark? I have a few answers that are substantiated by scientific, philosophical and theological backing. As humans we don’t want to look weak or less significant in the eyes of others. We are built for creativity and works but we also have a deep emotional need to belong, feel appreciated, respected and loved. If we don’t receive this, or perceive that we won’t receive this, we shrink. We protect. In short we do all that we can to not be exposed to possible ridicule or judgment. We think being vulnerable to this will be horrifying. Why? Because of this internal need to be accepted. It’s hard wired into us.

We just need to do one simple action. START. So, here I go. My first official blog on my brand new refreshed website www.beaconcoaching.ca ( please have a look around and let me know what you think, I value your opinion :). I’ve created space in my schedule to write and post a blog a week. This is my commitment. As I said, I value integrity as well as truth and authenticity very much. I also like challenges and accountability. So I am giving you my word. If you don’t see a blog post from me 1x per week, call me out. I’ll send you a $10 Starbucks card for your effort. Now that’s accountability!